With sightings of the Virgin Mary on a grape and a grilled cheese sandwich and sightings of Jesus in a store window and on a potato chip, it was just a matter of time until science and reason hero Charles Darwin made an appearance, right? The Onion claims to have spotted an image of the author of The Origin of Species on a concrete wall on a certain courthouse in Dayton, Tenn. Key quote:
"I brought my baby to touch the wall, so that the power of Darwin can purify her genetic makeup of undesirable inherited traits," said Darlene Freiberg, one among a growing crowd assembled here to see the mysterious stain, which appeared last Monday on one side of the Rhea County Courthouse. The building was also the location of the famed "Scopes Monkey Trial" and is widely considered one of Darwinism's holiest sites. "Forgive me, O Charles, for ever doubting your Divine Evolution. After seeing this miracle of limestone pigmentation with my own eyes, my faith in empirical reasoning will never again be tested."
Added Freiberg, "Behold the power and glory of the scientific method!"
Since witnesses first reported the unexplained marking—which appears to resemble a 19th-century male figure with a high forehead and large beard—this normally quiet town has become a hotbed of biological zealotry.
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